Day 18: Can you have too much of a good thing?

Tonight we had a booking for Silk Road, the on-board Asian restaurant. This is a very strange name as the silkroad ran to China, while the restaurant is Japanese, with a menu created by world-famous chef Nobuyuki “Nobu” Matsuhisa. I was told that it used to be called The Great Wall, which is equally. Whatever.

Anyhow we wanted to make sure we were hungry, so we only had a light breakfast in the room.

After Spanish class (muy bueno) we attended a talk given by Roger McGuinn (anyone under the age of 40 can stop reading now). McGuinn was co-founder, lead singer and lead guitarist of The Byrds. He talked about his early musical experiences meeting and playing with Joan Baez, the Mamas and the Papas, David Crosby, Bobby Darrin, interspersed with a bit of music.

The place was packed out. I guess all the old hippies and potheads sold out in the 1970s, and now they’re cashing in to pay for holidays on cruise ships. So much for the spirit of Woodstock.

We had a light lunch on the upper deck and watched Cuba 35NM off the port bow. Even at this range I could feel the evils of socialism sucking the liberty and freedom from my soul.

After lunch we returned to our cabin for some downtime. Doing nothing was wearing us out. Emma stepped out to buy some band-aids. When she returned she announced “we can never sail with another cruise line”.

“I see. Why?”

“The band-aids are free.”

This may sound like a strange reason to pick a cruise line. A bit of background may help:

Since our first or second day onboard we’d been saying to people we had bad feelings about Crystal. They’d look surprised, and we’d explain why: “we think they’re spoiling us”.

Firstly the service on Crystal is extraordinary. It’s prompt, friendly, and nothing is a problem. You no sooner sit down for lunch before a waiter asks what you’d like to drink. Before he’s had a chance to return three other waiters have stopped by to make sure you’re being looked after. And they all seem to remember your name.

Secondly all the little things that some cruise lines nickel-and-dime you for are free: the soft drinks in your room, the 24-hour room service, bottled water before tours, washing machines (including detergent and those weird fluffy things you put in the drier), Aveda toiletries, and the coffees – and they even know how to make a proper coffee.

So being told “band-aids are free, madam” just clinched it. It’s not the dollar value so much as the feel of the experience.

Sometimes on the Sun Princess I felt like I was simply a mark with a bulls-eye on my wallet. Even many of the social functions were thinly disguised sales pitches, such as the Captain’s Cocktail Party, most of which was spruiking future cruises.

The Captain’s Cocktail Party on the Crystal Symphony didn’t have a single word selling anything. The sole commercial activity was a photographer taking pictures of people in their formal attire, and this was optional.

(Personally I love this part because it’s the only time I can get Emma to sit for a photograph. I now have another nice set of photos that will have to last me until our next cruise.)

Back to food: we had found the Palm Court lounge the previous sea day entirely by accident. It was a happy accident for two reasons: firstly it is a beautiful spot on Deck 11 with panoramic views from the front of the ship. Secondly we knew where to go for the chocolate buffet.

So much for not eating too much. It was wonderful.

It more-or-less forced me to the gym to grind those calories away. Emma took the more aesthetic solution of walking the decks and watching the sun set.

Dinner was outstanding. The seared tuna was the best thing we’ve had on our holiday, and the wagyu beef was impressive as well. Plus the sushi, sashimi, tempura, not to mention a not-particularly-Japanese –but-very-yummy chocolate soufflé.

The only downside of the meal was the table next to us. Two Australian and two American couples were trying to outdo each other with their “I’ve done so terribly well” stories – well, the men were. I could have tolerated all the blather about their ranches, their work overseas, and the rest of their chest-thumping, if one of them wasn’t being rude to the waitress when he wasn’t trying to fondle her.

We’ll be back. If the show-offs show up we can always ask to be moved. Loudly.

That night’s production show was a series of songs from Oscar-winning musicals. The main vocalists, Cody Shawn Gay and Adriana D’Aria Lomysh, are excellent. Cody has performed at the Bellagio’s Fontana Room and Indigo Lounge in Las Vegas (not quite the main stage, but a few steps up from the back bar of the Dubbo RSL), while Adrianna has a number of small parts to her credit on Broadway, in film and on TV.

Sitting next to us was a couple who asked if this was our first cruise on Crystal. It was their 64^th. My jaw dropped, although Emma tells me there is a couple who has over 200 cruises on Crystal.

I’m starting to sound like I’m on the payroll. So, in the interest of balance and objectivity, this morning’s waiter didn’t have much personality, and yesterday we had to wait five minutes to place an order for coffee.

And we didn’t see dolphins. How crap is that?